10 August, 2012

The things we talk about

A sample conversation between me and my wife:

Ben: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3dWw9GLcOeA I, for one, welcome our new roof-surfing avian overlords  
Jean: That's completely inaccurate. He's not surfing at all.
Jean: He's snowboarding.
Ben: He's riding something on top of water. Surfing. QED.
Jean: He's riding a single object down a snowy slope. "Water" is flat.
Ben: http://www.hunuwan.com/WAVE1.jpg != flat
Jean: But definitely not shaped like that rooftop, either.
Ben: Not for very long, sure
Jean: Nor does the surfboard follow the "slope" of the water.
Ben: It's cold in Russia, things work different there
Jean: I'll worship the snowboarding bird, but I will not have this blasphemy that calls it "surfing."
Ben: The New Reformed Church of Water Sports Linguistics accepts definitions expansive enough for all believers.
Jean: They're heretics. They do not understand the TRUE nature of the bird.
Jean: Or of snow.
Ben: I've had enough of this, I'm calling the Crow Pope.
Jean: The Crow Pope is just a jumped-up carrion bird. True understanding of the love of Snowboarding Bird comes from directly viewing the video and understanding its meaning, not from the third-party interpretation of a bird in a silly hat.
Jean: Not exactly what I was looking for, but close enough: http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_mWTKhKCRAi8/TJrol2kMgXI/AAAAAAAADF8/B2RmSErw2gc/s1600/crow+hat_002.png
Jean: Here's your crow pope: http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-UgatH3upuyg/Tv5ACsZuYqI/AAAAAAAB-4s/91i-OU4iECo/s400/surprise%2Bparty%2Bcrow.jpg
Jean: And a promotional poster for his US Crowmobile tour: http://images.clipartof.com/small/95375-Black-Over-The-Hill-Crow-Wearing-A-Party-Hat-And-Standing-On-A-Cake-Poster-Art-Print.jpg
Jean: This appears to be him in extra-fancy ceremonial garb, with attendants (or possibly, decoys): http://www.trendytree.com/raz-christmas-decorations/images/h3153361-crowH3153361blackcrows.jpg
Jean: Do you have any idea how much those hats cost? Do you realize how many fledglings Crow Pope could have fed with that birdseed?

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